A young couple, of a conservative Jewish persuasion are anticipating getting married. Their parents, however insist they get married like "Grandpa and Gradma - the right way", so they go to an Orthodox rabbi for instruction.
After the instruction, the young man addresses the rabbi: ‘Well, Rabbi, I know that in our sect, after the ceremony when there is music and dancing, it is customary for the men to dance with the men, and the women to dance with the women. But this, after all, the 21st century — a new, enlightened age — and I would like your permission to be able to dance with my wife.”
The rabbi responds: “No, no, no! It is immodest for the man to dance with a woman.”
Now the young man is concerned about what IS allowed after marriage. So he asks the rabbi, hesitantly, “Well, I suppose that after marriage is it okay have sex?”
The rabbi quickly responds “Of course! It is a mitzvah (a blessing). To have children.”
The young man asks “Any position?”
“You’re inferring that there is more than one? But never mind, it is between you and your wife.”
The young man asks: “Woman on top?”
The rabbi, with eyes widened, says: “This is an education for me; but, yes, it is between you and your wife!”
The young man, feeling emboldened, asks: “And can we do it in an airplane, in flight, in the lavatory, in order to join the “mile high club”?”
The rabbi answers: “I am learning so much from this, but, yes, it is between you and your wife. But make sure to close the door of the lavatory!”
Then the young man asks: “And can we do it standing up?”
“NO!” says the rabbi, “you may NOT doing it standing up!”
“Why not?” says the young man.
“Because it could lead to dancing!”
Tuesday, May 28, 2013
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
The "What Does It Mean To Be A Jew", Revisited Yet Again
We seem to almost be a movement that has folded in on itself. For thousands of years, the shining light to the world was the jewish people. Justice, personal rights, regard for the less fortunate, universal education, protection of human life, land rights...these are all jewish, Torah values. And we, by lasting long enough to be finally listened to by the world, gifted these now universal rights to man.
The problem is, we don't know where to go next.
Religious Judaism has been flipped around to be a non-moving movement. It has developed a bunker mentality.
Conservative, reform, and further left factions of Judaism have abandoned the mechanisms of jewish innovation and identity, and are paying a ludicrous price in attrition to intermarriage as well as sheer apathy.
The level of understanding in Torah has plummeted - we do not have a vision of Torah, or IN Torah, to take part in modern development. And as such, we have been relegated to the sidelines in world debate. Even in our own country, the religious parties exist to maintain a status quo of pre-war yeshiva learning with state subsidy, instead of getting involved in the national directional debates (economy, "peace", army, etc.). And while yearning for religious practice increases in israel, as students are brought to Me'arat haMachpela to visit their grandparents, the religious sector continues to alienate those feelings with its bunkered insistence on black and white all or nothing laws and rules, religious and otherwise. As such, in israel and in the United States, the religious sectors act as some sort of analogue for Torah concepts, preserving them for future generations while simultaneously alienating the current one.
At its core, the question of what it means to be jewish has never been answered. To the religious, it is a religion. To the average Israeli, it is a cultural/historical legacy. To the average non-religious American, it is a belief system, an archaic and outdated moral code, and little else.
And those who stand for Torah MUST learn to engage the public, to engage reality, and to evolve and adapt Torah and themselves in a way that will not leave Torah an Amish-like museum curiosity. Already tours come through Me'ah Shearim - Boro Park is not far behind.
In summary, we either live on the cutting edge intersection if person, Torah, and G-d/Reality, or we are nothing more than a museum piece. At best.
The problem is, we don't know where to go next.
Religious Judaism has been flipped around to be a non-moving movement. It has developed a bunker mentality.
Conservative, reform, and further left factions of Judaism have abandoned the mechanisms of jewish innovation and identity, and are paying a ludicrous price in attrition to intermarriage as well as sheer apathy.
The level of understanding in Torah has plummeted - we do not have a vision of Torah, or IN Torah, to take part in modern development. And as such, we have been relegated to the sidelines in world debate. Even in our own country, the religious parties exist to maintain a status quo of pre-war yeshiva learning with state subsidy, instead of getting involved in the national directional debates (economy, "peace", army, etc.). And while yearning for religious practice increases in israel, as students are brought to Me'arat haMachpela to visit their grandparents, the religious sector continues to alienate those feelings with its bunkered insistence on black and white all or nothing laws and rules, religious and otherwise. As such, in israel and in the United States, the religious sectors act as some sort of analogue for Torah concepts, preserving them for future generations while simultaneously alienating the current one.
At its core, the question of what it means to be jewish has never been answered. To the religious, it is a religion. To the average Israeli, it is a cultural/historical legacy. To the average non-religious American, it is a belief system, an archaic and outdated moral code, and little else.
And those who stand for Torah MUST learn to engage the public, to engage reality, and to evolve and adapt Torah and themselves in a way that will not leave Torah an Amish-like museum curiosity. Already tours come through Me'ah Shearim - Boro Park is not far behind.
In summary, we either live on the cutting edge intersection if person, Torah, and G-d/Reality, or we are nothing more than a museum piece. At best.
Thursday, January 31, 2013
Jewish Identity
I think there is no accident that the further the idea of "people hood" gets from the western jewish identity, the more assimilation and back turning on it you find.
There has been a subtle, but radical, shift in how Jews see themselves in recent years. We went from a people in exile to a religion in a peopleless land (the US). And religions, they're interchangeable. You can pick em up and drop em as you go.
So people do.
If there is to be any meaningful difference in the future of jewish outreach, it is going to have to begin stressing that point.
There has been a subtle, but radical, shift in how Jews see themselves in recent years. We went from a people in exile to a religion in a peopleless land (the US). And religions, they're interchangeable. You can pick em up and drop em as you go.
So people do.
If there is to be any meaningful difference in the future of jewish outreach, it is going to have to begin stressing that point.
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